Rompin' and Stompin'

by The Charles Darwin Selection

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1.
The Charles Darwin Stomp (words&music by Ludo Klink) Keep ya' peckers up ol'boys, don't let them play with your toys Keep your chin up and grin everyday Though the world's a big ol' mess and your daytime full of stress We're so happy that we can play On this earth there's misery and pain Disasters no one can explain When there's a god, maybe he can tell Why we're all living like in hell There was a priest who told the natives: "RUN, when you die you go to hell and burn" The inuit said: "Fine, it's to cold anyway so your hell seems a real neat place to stay" When we were apes, life was not too bad Eat, shit and mate, all we ever had With evolution all the trouble starts Rape, kill and plunder and watching stupi darts So for all who believe this life is swell Look around and conclude it's living hell But we keep on singing anyway Play our Charles Darwin blues everyday
2.
Alfred Russel Rag (words&music Hans Hartgers) Alfred Russel was a man with a most perculiar job He travelled all around the world and never did he stop Looking for those animals of which no white man had heard But what Alfred most enjoyed has looking out for birds When Alfred Russel saw a bird no white man ever saw Alfred russel shot the bird although he was in awe 't was a beauty of a bird it was a real scientific birth Alfred Russel didn't know it was the last one on the earth Killing new found specimen seems an awful shame today But back in Alfred Russel's time it was the common way Kill it, stuff it, name it and then sent it back home Pack your bags and on you go, there's new grounds yet to roam When Alfred Russel saw the bird he didn't hesitate Alfred Russel shot the bird and thereby sealed it's fate 't was a beauty of a bird it was a real scientific birth Alfred Russel didn't know it was the last one on the earth In Borneo he saw some birds, they took him by surprise Someone aptly named them the birds of paradise One species carries Alfred's name: Wallace's standard wing But Alfred would have traded that for just one little thing When Alfred Russel saw the bird he never even blinked Alfred Russel shot the bird and it became extinct 't was a beauty of a bird it was a real scientific birth Alfred Russel didn't know it was the last one on the earth Later on in Alfred's life he had a brush with fame His and Darwin's theory were practically the same But Alfred didn't want the fame, the glory and the gold He thought about that lonely bird whose hide he never sold
3.
Going back south (words&music by Ludo Klink) Going back south on the back of my hand Spending hours waiting for the promised land Standing in the shadow, it's a hundred and ten Feeling low down dirty waiting for the man Pass the time waiting, watching people go by They seem to live easy and they're tellin' no lie Why am I so blue, it's more than I can take World seems collapsing and the levee's gonna break Hold on for a minute the man said to me Don't feel sad and lonely, listen to my plea There's always someone out there who can ease your pain Just sign over here and you're back in the game
4.
Devil put them bones in the ground (words&music by Hans Hartgers) At school we read in genesis how God created life But he misses out on dinosaurs, a source of constant strife Between me and my teacher, once I asked him to explain His disappointment was as big as Adams was in Cain Devil put them bones in the ground, bones in the ground, bones in the ground Devil put them bones in the ground to lead us all astray The bones that our forefathers found, burried in the ground Did not match no animal that they had ever found Were there ones fierce dragons that roamed around on earth? Poppycock and fairytales, for this is what I heard... Them bones destroyed the lives of Dr. Marsh and Mr. Cope The story of their "fossilfeud" reads like a vicious soap They fought for nearly twenty years, embittered to the bone When you're a paleontologist you'll end up all alone So don't trust them heathen scientists, all they tell is lies Turn upside down your family tree and much to your surprise Adam has moved down a notch, a diff'rent tree takes shape Instead of him resides on top a big and hairy ape! And when we go to heaven... or when we go to hell The things we learn about them bones, we wish that we could tell To all our friends down there on earth: "Take warning and take heed don't put your faith in scientists, they are the devil's breed!" Whether you believe in Darwin or to the gods do pray Museums of natural history would have nothing on display If the ground had been devoid of lizardegg and -bone So tell me Mr. Devil, did you do that all alone? Yeah, I did put them bones in the ground, bones in the ground, bones in the ground I did put them bones in the ground and led you all astray!
5.
Tutsinnarut 03:48
Tutsinarut (words&music by Hans Hartgers) Tutsinnarut, Tutsinnarut, Tutsinna, Tutsinna, Tutsinnarut Poor king Tut, his frontdoor's always shut! Though it nearly drove him nuts He simply didn't have the guts To leave his stoney hut Poor king Tut, his frontdoor's always shut! The air inside so stale and smelly But he dared not parade the valley In a kingly strut, Poor king Tutsinnarut! Shabti's they might disagree But they're not jolly company... Tutankhamun, look what Carter's done - Through the ages you lay sleepin' All that time no-one came peepin'- He let in the sun Tutankhamun felt: "Now my life's begun" 'Cause he was just like one of us Exept for his sarcophagus "Now I can have some fun" King Tut's havin' fun! Half the world paid him a visit Tutankhamun was a big hit... Poor king Tut, his frontdoor's never shut! hundreds pour in by the hour Tut his mood is turnin' sour He got what he wanted, but... Poor king Tut, his frontdoor's never shut! At night you hear him weep and moan: "I wish they'd all leave me alone I curse the whole damn lot!" Poor king Tutsinnarut!
6.
When I'm 84 03:33
When I'm 84 (words&music by Ludo Klink) You don't care about me girl, when I'm 84 You don't care about me girl, you don't love me no more You used to hang around with every man in town Now you're down and you lost your crown But you don't care about me girl, when I'm 84 She's a hot rod girl, yeah sure as it can be Took on a whole gang, it's plain dead to me A howling hellcat homping a hot steel hog Fierce as a straycat, vicious as a dog I used to buy you flowers and rings Now I'm out and another man sings You don't care about me girl, when I'm 84
7.
John Banvards folly (words&music Hans Hartgers) One day as I was passing through a town called Louisville I saw an advertisement that struck me as surreal A painting on an epic scale, to put other works to shame Painted by an unknown man, John Banvard was his name It was the river Mississippi as it flows through seven states Banvard rowed his boat two years and stretched it all the way I saw it with my own eyes as Banvard rolled it by Three miles of canvas, I tell you it's no lie! (He said) "It is the biggest in the land, watch me roll it out Yes! I'm gonna show it to the whole damn crowd Believe me when I tell you, and don't you get me wrong I tell you that this thing of mine is three mile long!" Sure it was the biggest that I had ever seen Banvard had all other painters turn a jealous green Who cared if there were painters with a subtle brushtechnique? From now on it's the size that counts: SMALL EQUALS WEAK! Well... but Banvard was a braggart prone to exaggerate His painting was not half as big as he himself did state He met his fate with Barnum, who called for his dimise And lured all Banvard clients away with even bigger lies (He argued) "It's the biggest in the world, please do take a seat Observe the Mississippi, I ain't no cheat! Believe me when I tell you and don't you get me wrong I tell you that this thing of mine is three miles long!"
8.
Train of love (words&music by Ludo Klink) I took the train at 9pm trying to get back home I spend my days hangin'around wherever I may room Because this train of love is passing by finding it's way to you Carry me and no other guy so I ain't felling blue I bless the day that we met, turned out to be no lie I'm telling you I have no regrets until the day I die A train can take you miles away, places you never been There is no turning back no more, this love ain't cruel and mean

about

Look what came crawling out from under a rock! The Charles Darwin Selection, a band from another time? Heck, they even seem to come from another úniverse!
Their selfpenned songs are not about things that normal people can be bothered with:
They sing about describing exotic birds for science; wellmeaning, but unsuccesfull missionaires; the terror of Darwin's theory of evolution; how Toetanchamon's (after)life got in a rut and the how and why of dinosaurbones in the ground.
Their musical influences are near-extinct musical types like ragtime, tradjazz, swing, hawaii-music, negro-spirituals en countyblues. Passionately brought back to life by the gents in a way not even 'herr doktor' Frankenstein could have imagined.
They take there music dead (pun intended) serious... but not themselves.
*Master-bullfiddleplayer Chris Wouters provides the foundation on which the other three by Charles Darwin selected members Manus Horst, Ludo Klink and Hans Hartgers can play their guitars, ukuleles, banjos mandolins, trumpets, trombones, wasboards, harmonicas en kazoos as if the electric guitar and the drumkit were never invented.
**Completing the picture is their wardrobe: cheap suits, bowties, breast-pocket handkerchiefs, garters and hats like the topper, the bowler hat and the fez. And they sound exactly like they look.
***Out of date, yet hip and happening.
Far, far out (of this world).

credits

released January 8, 2018

Hans Hartgers: guitar, banjo, banjolele, mandolin, washboard, egg, harmonica, kazoo and vocals.
Ludo Klink: guitar, dobro, lapsteel, slideguitar, glockenspiel, ukelele, mandolin, and vocals.
Manuel Horst: guitar, ukelele, mandolin, trombone, trumpet, washboard, melodica, and devilish vocals.
Chris Wouters: upright bass and vocals.
Recorded, engineerd and mastered at the Hillroad Records studios by Ruud Thijs. www.hillroadrecords.com

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The Charles Darwin Selection Enschede, Netherlands

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